the temple bell stops but the sound keeps coming
 
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July 2009
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Because I really want to see a Merlin fanvid set to Amy MacDonald's "A Wish For Something More." It would be Gwen's POV, and all about her crush on Merlin when she can see he is too busy crushing on Arthur to notice her. For serious, every line of this song has a corresponding Merlin scene in my head. It is so clear that I actually opened up Windows Movie Maker to attempt the impossible, but it wouldn't show my video or even import the song, so I took that as a sign that I should accept that my place in the universe does not lie in the video editing arena. Doesn't stop me pining though!

Alternatively, I could make a mix. However, I don't actually care enough about Gwen to make one that was just about her, so it would have to be everybody/Merlin and that would go the way of crack too fast for this song to really fit in it. I despair! See icon.

As a bonus for reading this strange and pretty much pointless post, here's the song in question.

Mood awakeMood awake
Music A Wish for Something More - Amy Macdonald
Tags: flailing, merlin, self-hatred and despair, wtf
search soleil [userpic]

In an attempt to exorcise my obsession with J. W. Waterhouse, I ended up making about 40 icons of his work. Also dumping some of my more recent/popular Havemercy-related icons here, just so that people who come looking for them at my journal can actually find them here.

If you take anything, please credit [livejournal.com profile] search_soleil in the comment space in your userpics. Also, please leave a comment because they make me feel all warm and fuzzy. Thanks!

[01-39] Art - John William Waterhouse
[40-45] Havemercy joke icons



The Rest )

Music Go Places - The New Pornographers
Tags: havemercy, my icons, waterhouse
search soleil [userpic]

Most recent Ouran scanlation (69) features Tamaki on a SEGWAY.

A FUCKING SEGWAY.

I AM NOT SHITTING YOU. HE SWEEPS ONTO CAMPUS RIDING IT WITH A SMILE THAT SPEAKS VOLUMES ON THE DEPTHS OF HIS OBLIVIOUSNESS AND RIDICULOUSNESS.

I don't think I have ever loved him more.

ETA: This chapter was seriously, seriously amazing. I'm with Kyouya--absolutely bursting with mad giggling over the return of the comedic insanity.

Mood head explody
Music The Call - Regina Spektor
Tags: flailing, lawl, manga, no accounting for taste, ouran, wtf
search soleil [userpic]

Thank you so much, everyone who commented on my last post. It means a lot to me. And you'll be relieved to hear that later that day I had a whole breakdown/cryfest that resolved a lot of the lingering issues, and I have been up and about for well over a week. Just in time for a CRAZY MIDTERM WEEK OF DOOM.

As proof of my gratitude, I will not complain about the midterm madness and will instead move on to lighter topics.

Things I have been doing with my time that you might actually be interested to hear about:

Merlin fandom (through Delicious) - I think I need to have Delicious taken away from me. It is a terrible and addictive timesuck and my network is far too enabling of the crazy fangirl indulgence. My Bradley James love continues to reach new heights of creepitude every day.

Anime-related bold points: Code Geass, Zoku Natsume Yuujinchou, Earl and Fairy )



Buffy the Vampire Slayer - Okay, so I am watching the show for the first time? I'm kind of in the middle of season 2 right now? I'm enjoying myself, but in true Elizabeth form failing to really love it because it has been over-hyped? However, I've heard the show doesn't really get truly awesome until like, season 5 or so? And Bradley James is a huge fanboy, so I figure this is just another way I am succumbing to the insanity of my love for him.

Antique - As in the Korean movie adaptation of Antique Bakery with the general hotness factor, and in particular the gay text/subtext quotient, turned up to 11. Basically, already awesome Antique Bakery now with SMOKING HOT GAY LOVIN' with a French Jonathan Rhys Meyers look-alike. And THREE-DIMENSIONAL(!) insanely delicious-looking pastry. And insanely GORGEOUS set designs and cinematography. And INSANELY INSANE RANDOM MUSICAL INTERLUDES. I basically watched this movie with my mouth hanging open the entire time.

Also, I had another Merlin dream where I was traveling with the gang in a kind of modern world, where we all had monster companions. Like, I'm talking digimon/pokemon, Japanese fighting familiar, amalgam-ish monsters. There were stock poses and cg sparkle effects and shit. My subconscious is an amazing place.

search soleil [userpic]

RL rant in the next few paragraphs, FList. Run while you can.

So, I found out last Tuesday that my oldest friend's mother had died, and instead of feeling grieved in any measurable, healthy way, I promptly stopped sleeping. This went on in a pretty intense and stubborn manner until the funeral this Monday, which I skipped classes for, during which I had a good cry and after which I hugged my parents and came back to school and slept for eight deep hours, and then had one blissful day of relative normalcy before Wednesday, when my body decided to expel all of its repressed confusion and grief in the form of a violent stomach virus, and then, after 24 hours of sickness and delirium (when I should have been in class, making up what I missed on Monday), I woke up feeling mostly better except that I was suddenly, once again, apparently unable to sleep.

I hate this. I hate this so much. I hate that death happens to good people, to people I love, and that my body is such a psychosomatic bitchface, and that I can't help but selfishly despair over the fact that this all happened a week before midterm season, and how I am in no way prepared to deal with all this except to loose my directionless fear and rage into the wilds of the Intranets in the early morning when I should be dead to the world and am instead far, far too alive to it.

search soleil [userpic]

SO. A MONTH LATER, I HAVE A LAPTOP AGAIN. HP customer service is really good, but I cannot say the same for their incompetent tech support division.

In celebration of my return, have a Hikago art meme. Though I think I completed it in the spirit that art was a very vague term that can encompass tooling around in paint with my roommate's tablet.

I think we can take away from this that I should never pursue a professional career in the visual arts. )

Location Java City
Music I Will Survive on the overhead radio
Tags: anime, emotional blackmail, fangirling, flailing, hikago, lawl, memes, no accounting for taste, wtf
search soleil [userpic]

MY LIFE IS A MESS.

Thing 1: I got to college and on my second day of classes my brand new laptop died. I suppose this was partially my fault. I fell asleep with it on my lap, awoke to it in a pile of dirty clothes beside my bed, and then found later that day that the laptop's battery socket was so loose it couldn't recognize my adapter when I plugged it in. But this is not what I told the lovely people at HP when I sent it in, so they had me send it to them, where they will fix it for free (because I am still under warranty, because I'd only had the laptop for two weeks).

So, what this amounts to is me having an extended nervous breakdown as I keep reaching for a laptop that is not there, and needing to do work and not having a laptop to do it on, and etc etc etc. [livejournal.com profile] loweryourwand has been very gracious and has let me use her laptop, but I don't like the fact that I'm basically on it all the time, yet it is hers and she has regular need of it.

Thing 2: I have this insane schedule that I think I'm going to have to prune even though, by God, I don't want to, because all of my classes are awesome (except Astronomy, which sucks, but it is a requirement, so I am stuck with it regardless of my personal opinions). Probably what will go is the complit class (Big Brother: The Poetics of Power). Already gone is Gender and Sexuality in Ancient Greece. What will be left is:

1) Enchanted Imagination, which is an English seminar that focuses on the continuity of Romantic/Victorian fantasy into our modern equivalent (hahaha, watch me die happy).
2) Astronomy, which I hate, and its lab, which will suck even worse, hoorah! I will valiantly struggle through.
3) Victorian Poetry with the professor who taught Romantic Poetry last semester, and who I have a GIGANTIC ACADEMIC CRUSH on. Talk Tennyson to me, baby!
4) Literary Criticism, which is a requirement for English majors, and is taught by my current adviser, who is a dear, although he is currently frustrating me rather a lot with his fluid office hours which make it impossible for me to talk about my current schedule.

The issue comes from having so many English classes which emphasize survey and participation. Basically, all of my classes want me to read a ton and also write about it or present on it. And I am slow and lazy and do not know how to deal with the workload I'm looking at with Big Brother still on my plate. HOWEVER, I really feel like I'm limiting myself overmuch by focusing so closely on English, and on a specific kind of English at that.

And to complicate my feelings, I can't tell how much of this academic angst is being unnecessarily inflamed by my general panic over my laptop and if things will seem any more manageable when I am not a nervous wreck 24/7. This is why I'd really like to talk to my adviser, and why I am so very frustrated that he cannot seem to keep his hours straight. I am in desperate need of advising! >:(

Thing 3: In other news, I'm going to NYCC and I am very excited! I am also sort of panicking that it's going to take a whole weekend that I will need for the crazy amount of work that I'm doing, but I am trying to focus on the positive, which is Torchwood previews and free stuff.

search soleil [userpic]

I have that itchy, bored feeling that tells me I should be doing something, so I started messing around with my icons. Here, have a meme.

MAH ICONS )

Mood boredMood bored
Music What I Did For Love - John Borrowman
Tags: icons, memes
search soleil [userpic]

I was just talking about the slash dragon and 1) how I still like him even after his horrible betrayal, 2) the tenor of his speeches in that last couple of episodes when he was like "us mythical beings got to stick together" or whatever, and 3) how Merlin's eyes flash golden like the dragon's eyes when he uses magic. Suddenly, the following exchange popped into my head:

Merlin: You know nothing of my father!
Dragon: Merlin, I am your father!
Merlin: NOOOOOOO.

WTF, self. WTF.

Music Untouched - The Veronicas
Tags: merlin, wtf
search soleil [userpic]

OH MAN, NEW EPISODE OF ZOKU NATSUME YUUJINCHOU, YOU GUYS. SOOOO GOOD. I like Natsume Yuujinchou best when it is like this, when it makes me tear up and appreciate all of the people in my life who make sure I never spend a day alone. The new season is really good so far, I am so gladdddd.

Also, I am really, REALLY excited for next week's ep. Totally polishing my slash goggles, hahaha! *rubs hands together*

ETA: Listening to this song (In This City, thanks [livejournal.com profile] thisissirius! <3), it actually fits reaaallllyy well with Natsume Yuujinchou. Like I needed another fanmix bunny. :(

Mood smileyMood smiley
Music In This City - Iglu & Hartly
Tags: anime, fangirling, natsume yuujinchou
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